Revenge of the Nerd

I’m reading a book about revenge. It’s more than 2,000 chapters , and right now, I’m on 1,945 th chapter.

I love reading stories on revenge because

1. I believe there is no true justice without restitution.

2. To apologize and ask for forgiveness are not enough in my book. Sure, I can forgive or accept an apology, but I’ll never forget. It’s like a scar that will never disappear, and whether this is right or wrong, I red mark the character of the person who has wronged me. I’ll never look at that person the same way again, ever.

3. I hate bullies. Who doesn’t , anyway?

When I say I hate bullies, I really mean that. Getting bullied is something that I have experienced personally…. and no, I wasn’t overthinking, nor suffering from persecution complex. My experience was straightforward physical bullying.. I was a 7 year old new immigrant from the Philippines, short, ( well, I’m still short ) ,thin, and could barely speak English. I was an easy target. The bullying was something that people only see on TV. I was elbowed and nudge off the food line at the cafeteria, everyday ,for more than a month. I decided to bring my own lunch, but this 150 lb. orangutan continuously harassed me. She made fun of my lunch…. fried rice, sweet -sour pork , pork chop, noodles, etc. “Oh, a rice eater. Where are your chopticks ? ” That fat ugly orangutan was a freakin’ racist. So young, yet so corrupt.

Unfortunately, we took the same school bus. It was worse on the bus. Every time she’s passed by me, she’d hit my head. Or, she’d sit behind me and pull my hair. What kind of person would do that. I don’t care if she was just a child herself. She was naturally evil. What made me snap was when she sat behind me and hit my head continuously… thump, thump, thump. I stood up and hit her with my backpack. She stood up, shoved me and kicked me. That was the only time I cried. I finally told my Mom what was happening to me at school. My Mom wrote a scathing letter to my teacher and the principal. The next day, there was a meet-up with my mother and her mother at the principal’s office. I had so many witnesses to the bullying, including some classmates and the bus driver. Needless to say, the bully was suspended for one week. Physical bullying was a serious offence.

Then, my mother said to me… Ren, don’t get mad, get even.

Fortunately, a newly transfered classmate befriended me, and another classmate who was also my neighbor. They had witnessed the bullying, They said, ” Ren, fight back. We’ll help you. ” So, we started the campaign . We’d make oink, oink , monkey, and gagging sounds when she was around. My neighbor/classmate told her sister (who was in 6th grade )about her, so, a group of 6th graders confronted and warned her to stop the bullying, or else. Then, another opportunity came to further hurt her. My birthday. My mother brought to school birthday treats for my classmates. I still remember the stuff……….. 1 muffin, 2 Krispy Kremes, expensive chocolates ( 1 Toblerone, a package of Lidnt Chocolates, Ferrero ) a bag of chocolate crinkles, nicely ribboned , an invitation card to my birthday party at home, and most importantly , a box of colored pencils for each classmate. Why was that box of colored pencils important? We heard the bully’s mother couldn’t buy a box of colored pencils ’til payday. Payday? More like welfare. Anyway, my 2 classmates distributed the goodies , each one got their share, except one, the bully. Everybody noticed she got none. They understood. It was payback time. Oh, and take note, she was also a bully in our class, so they were all glad she finally got her comeuppance.

‘Was it harsh? No, I don’t think so. Revenge is a dish best served cold. Every action , decision and choice have a consequence . It was a lesson that I hoped she’d never forget. I’m sure she didn’t. I saw her last year pushing supermarket carts. She saw me….. and avoided me. Heh. That’s your job? Is your father still in jail ? Does you mother still have to wait for payday to buy a loaf of bread ?Karma is, indeed , a bitch.

Do you think I’m actually the loser for not forgiving and forgetting ? In a way, yes. It still haunts me. But that’s exactly the reason why people should not bully and hurt the weak. It can result in long -time trauma. To this day, every time I remember the image of the 7 year old me eating my lunch in a corner, alone, hiding, and getting physically bullied, I tremble with anger……. anger for kids who are also experiencing the same pain and hurt right now, somewhere. I’m sure that like me, they will be scarred for life because they will never forget.

13 responses to this post.

  1. I think the orangutan got exactly what she deserved.

    She got a taste of her own medicine.

    And then some.

    Reply

    • I’m thinking about it now like an observer. That time, the feeling was worse, because the bullying was an everyday thing. I wrote about just a few of my experiences. As a kid, I couldn’t understand why it was happening to me. I was just scared to be seen . Thinking back, it feels very surreal . It’s like I’m watching this little girl on TV. I never felt this anger when it was happening , just fear.

      Reply

  2. I believe in karma. Every time someone picked on me something worse happened to them. If I did something bad to someone else something bad happened to me. I was a mean girl until I realized why should I be this way. But yes revenge is better served cold

    Reply

    • I didn’t decide to fight back . Other people decided for me. All I ever felt then was fear, not anger. But I thank them for helping and protecting me.

      Reply

  3. I hate bullies too. And you weren’t the loser for not forgiving and forgetting.
    There’s something deeper there which you hinted at, which is that this young girl was part of a family that was poor– and she was probably abused at home. So she bullied others at school. Her personality problems were probably caused by her conditions at home, which is very sad.
    That doesn’t excuse bullying, but it does partly explain it.
    I was bullied too as a child– for being different. I was too big (too tall: I turned out to be six foot, seven inches.)
    Anyway, revenge is sweet, and it is best served cold.

    Reply

    • Her backstory is most probably it, but it doesn’t give her the right pass it on to an innocent person, someone who has nothing to do with her . What she did was too devious. The story I posted is just the tip of the iceberg. It was so bad that I vomited at school several times. I was just a kid, I should be playing and living a happy life with no worries, instead, I was terrorized and harassed , and I didn’t know why.

      Reply

  4. What goes around, comes around👏. Loving that Nero meme 😁

    Reply

  5. My heart goes out to you, Ren. ❤ I’m so glad the orangutan got her comeuppance. I feel your pain because I too was physically amd mentally bullied from sixth grade until I finally changed schools during my last year of high school. It got so bad that I attempted suicide at the age of fourteen and almost didn’t make it. Thankfully I survived and am now living a happy and productive life.

    Know that you aren’t alone and that you have value no matter what. Her behavior was only a reflection of her own mental issues.

    Awesome post!

    Reply

    • I find their behavior incomprehensible. I had a classmate ( my seatmate ) who was kind of effeminate, but I wasn’t sure if he was actually gay. We wittnessed the bullying. After about half a year of being constantly bullied, he shot himself, and died. The teacher , with bloodshot eyes from crying, came to our classroom and gave us the news of his suicide. We all felt guilty because we didn’t protect him. Later, an association for the protection of LGBQT was established at our school , headed by our teacher. There was another gay classmate whom we protected that time. How? We saw to it he was always with several classmates hanging out with him. He was never alone.

      Reply

      • My heart goes out to the classmate who ended his life. But I’m glad you all stepped up and protected other bullied kids at your school. No.one has the right to bully someone over the lifestyle they chose.

        Reply

  6. i agree with #2, my mind has a 3 strike rule then i don’t want that person in my life to repeat on me like a bad meal. #3 , you became #3 , not judging , i just don’t think it works,by that i mean in your head it does but in the bullies head they just become the victim .in some ways i think it is what they want as they are lifes victims. great topic.🙂

    Reply

  7. Bullies are usually very insecure about their own self worth. You have the advantage as the one being bullied to demonstrate your own self worth to such a weaker soul. But I would be careful where and when I use revenge.

    Reply

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